Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Idol Thoughts (Top 36, Round 1)...

So now the fun begins.  Each week here at The Dice is Right I will continue the insanity and dementia that is the Idol Thoughts blog I started a few seasons ago.  This is where I pretend that there is some rhyme and reason to the Idol process and throw my hat in with millions of others offering both opinions and predictions each week and then making lame excuses for where I went wrong.  The added dimension this year is that only 3 of these 12 are getting through.  Yikes!  Throw a little tension on the grill Simon, Idol's cooking pressure burgers tonight!  Best guy, best girl, and best other overall vote getter.  I actually kind of like it but it definitely puts the focus on the contestants we already know.

Seacrest is preening, it's time to begin!

Jackie Thon, "Little Less Conversation." - The chick that sang down the walls of Jericho in the tryouts (well at least the window screens of New York City) now goes for the Top 12.  How's the performance?  A bit over the top.  To be honest, you can just feel the desperation dripping off of her as these guys know that only 3 are getting through tonight.  Randy thinks she's an entertainer, I think she's a walking plea for attention (or more accurately a plea for votes).  The vocal was just bad and there is no place for her in the top 12. (C-)

Ricky Braddy, "A Song For You" - The first of those that have no chance because we don't know who they even are.  Great vocal performance and he will pick up some votes, but this is the kind of contestant who will suffer most from the new format.  One week is not enough for these "unknowns" to break through.  Still really good stuff. (B+)

Alexis Grace, "Never Loved A Man" - "The Pink Streak" takes the stage and will have some votes right off the bat for two reasons, we can identify her and she's got a baby.  I'm not quite sure the performance was enough to put her over the top but I enjoyed it and if no other girls bring the house down she might be the one to beat.  She certainly is the first tonight to really connect with her song in a real way. (A-)

Brent Keith, "Hick Town" - Idol is having some real technical issues tonight.  Mics are off, cameras aren't cued, and now they start the wrong intro piece and we have to watch Seacrest do his best Improv theater impression?  Somebody(ies) getting fired tonight.  Oh, about the Brent guy, no chance, not one solitary chance he gets through. (C)

Stevie Wright, "You Belong With Me" - I'm sorry, did she just say she was 9 when the show started?  That would be enough reason for me to not vote for her, how dare she make me feel so old?  Well, that is, if she didn't just step out and give one of the most nervous, out of breathe, can you tell I'm out of my league, performances in Idol history.  Ouch, poor girl, hopefully she can move on and not dwell on her blown chance. (D-)

Anoop Desai, "Angel of Mine" - Noop dog takes the stage and....  wait, Noop dog? Really? You're sure?  OK...  Noop dog takes the stage and gives it his best shot and sorta kinda does really good.  He can sing, but the only thing that kept me awake during his performance was when he would go off tune for a second and shock me out of my slumber.  He has a chance because we know him, but it wasn't a great performance. (B-)

Casey Carlson, "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic" - Another girl, another desperate pitiful performance.  It's like these gals don't get that they are supposed to be communicating through music not just doing a show.  They aren't connecting with the song at all.  The more girls take the stage, the more I like The Pink Streak.  (D)

Michael Sarver, "I Don't Wanna Be" - Oil Rig guy is an early favorite of mine, so you can imagine my disappointment in whatever that was he just left on the stage. Again, QUIT PLAYING TO THE CAMERAS AND SING US A SONG!  Make us feel it, connect with it, oh and one other thing, find a right note every once in a while.  He may get through because he is known, but he didn't deserve it on the merits of what he just did, that's for sure.  I DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE! Sorry, had to.  (C-)

Ann Marie Boskovich, "Natural Woman" - Wow, the Idol stage is eating contestants alive tonight.  Ann did better than the last few natural women, but there was still that strange disconnect that has been plaguing so many tonight.  She didn't blow it like the others, but I don't think many will remember her at the end of the night.  I think it's looking pretty certain that two guys are going through tonight. (C+)

Stephen Fowler, "Rock with You" - I can forgive someone slipping up on words, but walking off stage, come on man, that's just rude.  But the real reason I'm not voting for you tonight, is you completely tried to rock with a song that was out of your range, and your overproduced karaoke choreography made me sick.  The curse continues.  (C-)

Tatiana Del Toro, "I'm Saving All of My Love For You" - I'm begging, please, for the love of all that is just and good, don't let her sing well.  I couldn't stand myself if somehow I had to type that... hold on she's singing... oh no... please no... the notes are on pitch, she's got a strong voice, and she is connecting with her song.  I guess the joke is on me, because honestly, other than Pinkie, she is the only girl that even sang well tonight.  God help us, but she might be going through (Cue crazy laughter.) (B)

Danny Gokey, "Hero" - Oh Danny boy, why did you have to do that to me?  I really like you, like really like you.  You performance was easily the best of the night, your vocals were tight, and you rocked it.  BUT WHY THAT SONG?!  Dude, you should know better.  Call me the over thinker that I am, call me the literalist that I am, but THE HERO DOES NOT LIE IN YOU!  The hero is most assuredly found outside of us and that song is one of the most blatant humanistic pieces of false feel good tripe ever written.  Ok now that that's off my chest, GO DANNY, GO!! (A)

Should be in the Top 12:

Danny Gokey
Alexis Grace
Ricky Braddy (who? exactly)

Other Possibilities:

Tatiana Del Toro (oh boy)
Anoop Desai (Noop dog in da house)
Michael Sarver (though he doesn't deserve it)

Chewed up and spit out by the Idol stage:

Ann Marie Boskovich
Casey Carlson
Stevie Wright
Jackie Thon
Brent Keith
Steven Fowler

Official prediction for who will be in the Top 12:

Danny is a given and I'll give streaky the nod for the gals.  The third slot will come down to a battle between Noop, Sarver, and Tatiana, even though Braddy deserves it in my opinion.  I'd give Sarver the edge (because people like him) but I have the sinking feeling Tatiana might be with us for the Top 12.